December 29


Later
P.S.  Please take my bank book in around Feb. 1 or so.  O.K.?

Darling-

      I had a nice long nap after I wrote to you and then Ben Casey came over and drove me to the staff store where I stocked up on goodies.  I just finished a steak and some spinach and consequently feel much happier with the world.  My abscess seems to have taken care of itself, at least I'm not having any more trouble with it at the moment.  Saggam is relearning everything I taught her before I left.  I spent the day with her more or less and she has calmed down completely now.  I am determined to teach her to obey as blindly as my children do.  She comes now at the snap of my fingers and a low call, as the book said she would.  I have her almost house broken.  I want her to respond to a few calls before I send her to you so you won't have any trouble with her.  It is very difficult to teach two dogs at the same time though.  I have Emily's dog too as she is still in Tehran.  They are very jealous of each other and bite each other's asses if I pet one and not the other.  Saggam is a great help to me over here because she gives me something to put my arms around.  Funny what a great release that is for me.  She responds to petting and hugging the same way I do.  I can really understand your attachment to Fu now.

     I hope I haven't worried you excessively by telling you about my new abscess.  Really I smiled on that train as the abscess began to pound.  It waited until the minute the crack, non-stop train pulled out of the station.  The irony of it was so bitter that I had to smile.  It was beautifully timed.

     You're a darling to offer to take so much trouble with Saggam before I arrive.  I'm doubly happy now that I decided to come home early.  Not only because of you but I know that it will take from 2 to 3 weeks to straighten out this dental problem. 

     Did you  receive a Christmas card from Lois?  I keep referring to mine because she mentioned how much she enjoyed your letter.  I know the 4 of us will have a wonderful time together this summer.  They said they were having a house warming party this month and were sorry we couldn't join them but that they would have a special one for a "select few" in August.  I love them dearly - even more than I used to because they sound so genuinely enthusiastic and warm about next summmer.  Really it moves me tremendously when I think that those two are happily anticipating seeing us together.  I can't tell you how I'm looking forward to it especially after having just spent several days being escorted around  Tehran by the world's biggest bore.  I have a very difficult time pretending to  be happy and pleased around men.  The poor things do their damn best and it's all wasted on me.  I cannot respond to them.  I  can't even remember that he is my date, let alone respond.  Carolyn is very sick mentally.  Did you get a Christmas card from Frances?  I didn't and I sent her one.  I'm afraid you're right about her being a dog in the manger and taking everything as a personal insult.  It's funny that as well as I know how badly suited you two are for each other, she is the only person in the world that I know who makes me feel insecure where you're concerned.  Perhaps it's the memory of how I felt that night you picked me up in New York and talked so long about how sad you felt at having left her.  In all the time I've known you I have never felt like just turning around and walking away from you.   But I did that night.  That was because I was convinced that you were in love with her and were just using me to "show her".  I don't think that anymore though - obviously or I wouldn't be writing to you or planning to live with you in 6 months.  I am going to try very hard to be in Cedar Rapids sometime on Thursday July 2nd 1964.  I will send Saggam whenever you say, give or take a day or 2.  It is not very difficult to do that from here.  Can you possibly make a reservation for her at a kennel for the time that you and I are gone?  I love you my darling and I will gladly pay the rent on that duplex a month early.  Please know that you have no cause for financial worry especially if the University comes across with a job but even if they don't.

I love you.

C